If I was asked to define dominance in a D/s relationship, I think I would have a very difficult time. I suspect there are as many definitions as there are D/s relationships. My point is, there is no right or wrong here. There is really no criteria explicet to a D/s relationship. That is what makes D/s so exciting. The most important thing a D/s couple should do to define their relationship is to do what is real for them.
I call LBR “the Gentle Domme.” She is not harsh in her ways. When she asks for something to be done, and she expects that I, as the submissive, will do it since my greatest desire is to please her. She is not big on punishment and believes I should respect her wishes. If I fail to complete a task, she will be disappointed, but I am unlikely to receive any physical punishment.
I, on the other hand, enjoy a more physical form of domination. And I have received some wonderful physical domination at the hands of LBR.
But what I want most is for LBR to be herself. That gives me the highest high. This past week I was dominated is a most gentle, but intense way. We were laying in bed, and LBR was sharing how some of my recent behaviour was bothering her. It really bothered me that I was the source of tears for my beautiful Queen. I went very quiet. LBR knew, I think, that I just wanted to be left alone, but she refused to allow that. She told me that she wanted to hold me. In response, I suggested I would get ready for bed and then return to LBR. She would have no delays, and demanded that I come to her. I relinquished. LBR caressed my head and told me how much she loved me. I had the most intense feeling of peace and contentment come over me. The emotional connection was overpowering. The domination was gentle, but so very intense.
I love LBR and want her to be herself, above all. I am so lucky to have LBR in my life.